Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Random Thoughts

So, apparently, my plans to write regularly were completely forgotten. 

I don't feel bad about it. 

I'm a grown up. 

This is my blog. 

I do what I want to do!

I had a frightening dream last night about my husband having a fight with an aggressive, disrespectful man who'd shoved a lady trying to rush her onto the elevator. I was in the elevator already, and a different lady in front of me was trying to push me back with her butt. I just laughed at her.

I watched from inside the elevator a man trying to provoke my husband by elbowing him because he didn't like how closely my husband was standing behind him (they were in a crowd of people, all aggressive, all pushy, except for myself, my niece and sister, who were on the elevator with me, and my husband). My husband just looked at him like he was crazy, but didn't defend himself or even ask him to stop. In real life, he would have asked him to stop in a non-aggressive way. (He'd give the man the benefit of the doubt and say something like, "Excuse me, will you please be careful with your elbows, they are bumping into me.") It wasn't until my husband saw the man put his hands on a woman that he confronted the man and began to fight with him. Again, that is so true to who he is in real life. My husband is much quicker to defend someone else than he is to defend himself. 

What scared me about seeing him fight was not that he would hurt the man, though hurt him he would. It was that my husband would get arrested for it and be taken away from me. I knew he felt what he was doing was right, so I didn't question his actions - I just didn't want him to be punished for it. I squeezed my way through the crowd in the elevator toward my husband, screaming, "Please, please stop! Oh, Jesus, Jesus, Jesus please stop it!" God opened my eyes when I screamed, "JESUS!" one last time after seeing that my husband had picked the now unconscious man up and slung him over his shoulder. It was God who opened my eyes, yes. Not an alarm, a sound, an urge to go to the bathroom - nothing. My eyes just opened after screaming His name. 

I don't often remember my dreams, so it's interesting to me how well I'm remembering this one. It may not mean anything, but I still found it telling in a way that I should probably keep to myself...

This morning, while in my car waiting for my train to come, I started to ponder my preference for silence. It's something I've noticed about myself that is unique in my household full of people who prefer to have music in their ears all day, every day, sometimes, even in their sleep. When we're in the car, they want music. When hanging out in their rooms, they want music. While commuting to school or work, they want music. Personally, I can't think with all that noise in my ear all day. Please don't misunderstand me, I do like music on occasion, and some of my preferences may even surprise you considering what I just shared with you about preferring silence. It's just not my constant companion. I'd rather sing to myself or be completely quiet.

I was going to suggest that my family uses music as a way of escaping reality so that they don't have to deal with their own thoughts, but really, I have a way of doing that, too: through books. Currently I'm reading the Divergent series; I'm on book two: Insurgent. When I'm not reading, however, I do prefer to talk to myself and to God. Sometimes I have entire conversations with him in my head...mostly it's just me asking, "God, why do I keep doing that, saying that, BEING THAT?!" Just joking...

Kind of...

Until whenever!

XOXOXO - Jessika

Wednesday, December 25, 2013

Merry CHRISTmas!

From my family to yours: we wish you a very safe, merry and super blessed Christmas holiday!

Remember the REASON for the SEASON!


May God bless you today and always!



Thursday, December 19, 2013

Dear A&E, Congratulations, You Just Committed Suicide


Original link:
Dear A&E, congratulations, you just committed suicide


Dear A&E,

I read that you are indefinitely suspending Phil Robertson from Duck Dynasty after he quoted the Bible and said that the homosexual act is sinful. I get it, guys. I do. You punished the Christian guy for being a Christian because you got some angry emails from a bunch of whiny gay activists who lack the spine and maturity to deal with the fact that there are still people out there who have the guts to articulate opinions that they find disagreeable. In so doing, you’ve kowtowed to a pushy minority of vocal bullies who don’t even watch your channel, while alienating the fan base of the one show that keeps your entire network afloat.

Makes sense.

You’ve got standards, after all. You wouldn’t want to be associated with tasteless and inappropriate things. The people on Duck Dynasty can’t be allowed to run around being all Christian-like. It might ruin the reputation of the network whose other shows include Hoarders and Intervention — programs that invite viewers to gawk at drug addicts and the mentally ill for their own amusement.

Disney-ABC Television Group owns 50 percent of your network, were they involved in this decision? They must have been. They’ve got a brand to protect. They can’t allow a bearded right winger to spout beliefs. BELIEFS, of all things. The horror! We must shutdown beliefs, opinions, and ideas, and get back to the serious business of selling sex and debauchery to children. They can’t deal with these distractions, don’t they have another season of The Bachelor or Desperate Housewives or Trophy Wife to produce?

Good Lord, these militant neo-liberal thought police are better at brainwashing than I ever realized. They just convinced you to torpedo your own network. You guys just kamikazed yourselves. You just pulled the pin on the grenade and then put it in your pocket. This is incredible. Didn’t you see what happened with Chic-fil-A when GLAAD crusaders tried to shutdown an entire business just because they disapproved of the owner’s opinions? Don’t you remember that? I’ll refresh your memory: their “boycott” resulted in an enormous sales spike for the company, as millions of people like myself went out of our way to eat there just to ensure that the anti-free speech fools on the left didn’t win. A week after the anti-Chic-fil-A campaign began, their restaurants across the country were overflowing. It was, officially, the least effective boycott in the history of mankind.

Now it’s all going to happen again, except it will be the opposite effect, and you’ll be on the losing end this time around.

If you don’t bring Phil back immediately, and publicly apologize to him and to his viewers for attempting to censor his Christian faith, Duck Dynasty will leave your network, find a new home, and all of those ratings will go somewhere else. Then you’ll be stuck with the stragglers who feel like spending a Saturday rubbernecking at mentally disturbed elderly women with compulsive hoarding addictions. That’s how this is going to play out. Congratulations.

Did you think the “gay rights” crowd would stick around and “support you” for meeting their ransom demands? No, silly A&E, that isn’t how this works. The speech-controllers on the left are like a black hole. They can only suck you in and obliterate you. They’re like the devil — they ask for your soul and offer nothing in return.

Am I coming on too strong?

Just wait.

Just you wait.

This is the worst decision you’ve ever made. Well, “Bonnie and Clyde” was the worst decision, but this is a close second. Speaking of which, just to make sure we’re clear, the violent mini-series glorifying a couple of thugs who robbed some banks and killed some people 80 years ago — OK. Wholesome family man quotes the Bible during an interview with GQ — UNACCEPTABLE. Is that the correct equation? Is that your business model?

Just to be doubly clear: you guys hate the Bible and find it to be offensive, right? Or is it just parts of the Bible? Or is it just Christians? Or is it just Christians who have the audacity to believe in the entire Bible, rather than a select few segments that pass the modern PC litmus test? Just let me know, and I’ll send the word along to my readers, many of whom are Christians who watch — I mean, used to watch –A&E. I’m sure they’ll be interested in finding out that you view their faith as so abhorrent that you’d fire a guy simply for quoting a passage from their Holy Book.

You made your bed. You decided to stand against free speech, against open expression of ideas, against Christians, against the Bible, against the views of a majority of humanity, against the most profitable show in the history of your network, and against almost all of your viewers. But, hey, at least you put a smile on GLAAD’s face. That must make it all worth it, right?


Everyone who isn’t a left wing extremist (AKA your former customer base)

Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Just One Of Them Dayz...

I'm not mad at anyone, nor do I have any complaints at the moment - well, with the exception of a little back pain - yet, I'm having one of those days where I just want to be completely alone.

Unfortunately, the only place I can get to do this - if I need to be alone during the week, that is - is at work. I haven't needed this in a while, but, then again, I often get to be alone on Saturdays. My husband often takes the kids out for the entire day. I take this time to nap, read, play games on my computer or phone, take care of my nails, and/or watch movies with British actors in them if total silence is NOT the order of the day...today, it is.

I'm currently in my office alone, with nothing but the hum of computer systems that haven't been shut off to keep me company. I like it. I don't feel like talking to or listening to anyone; I don't feel like looking at anyone or being looked AT for that matter. It's weird.

Do you ever get in a mood where just about anything annoys you? You have no idea why and none of it makes sense, but everything's just intolerable? It's been such a long time since I've felt this way, but I'm certain that I'm most unhappy with myself, meaning, what's REALLY annoying me, is ME...

I'm taking this time to get over myself and return to normal before I begin to alienate my family. WAIT!!!!!!!!!

I just had an epiphany, I think. I'm thinking about a certain someone's attitude recently and how what I'm feeling now COULD be exactly what he's been feeling lately, but his adolescent mind doesn't analyze his emotions further by acknowledging that you can't take your self pity or whatever you want to call it out on others! Disliking yourself for the moment doesn't mean you should prevent others from showing you love and affection. You should GET OVER IT, love others anyway and allow yourself to BE loved! Yes!

I already feel 100 percent better and am regretting having ordered those noodles from the Chinese place that I now have to wait for before I can leave to go home to my beautiful family!!!!


Until next time,

XOXOXO - Jessika

Thursday, December 5, 2013


This morning, I was very nearly in tears. Feeling hurt and betrayed and entirely hopeless as I left the house, I found myself automatically going into silent prayer. By the time my husband and I made it to the train platform, I was holding onto his arm and thanking God that I was not having to go through this alone.

The heaviness in my heart was lifted, and I felt, and continue to feel, 100 percent confident that God will find a way to permanently fix the issue. What good was my continuing to groan about my heartbreak going to do for the situation? Not a thing. God's got my back; of that, I'm very certain.

Until next time,

XOXOXO - Jessika

Wednesday, November 27, 2013

Immutable Ramblings: SMILING IT FORWARD™

Immutable Ramblings: SMILING IT FORWARD™: Disclaimer: I have received information and products from McNeil Consumer Healthcare Division of McNEIL-PPC, Inc., the makers of TYLENOL®. ...